May 11, 2025

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Proverbs 31:30 "Charm is deceptive, and beauty does not last; but a woman who fears the Lord will be greatly praised." 

Without the thousands of appointments, there hasn't been much to update here lately. I've had 3 treatments so far and luckily, none of the typical side effects, except the hair loss... that has been unreal! So glad I ordered my wig when I did and didn't wait until the hair started falling out. 

Saturday Sam, Ashli and I drove to Chesapeake to celebrate Tracey's 50th birthday. My sweet baby girl is all about saying Mimi now.... 💖 

It was a good trip. Tracey got surprised with real baby highland cows at her party. The excitement was real. I got to hang out with all my "babies" that are grown now. Hung out with most of my girls. Saw extended "family". It was nice. Not the loud, obnoxious throw downs we used to have but I think I like it better this way now. Guess I'm getting old. LOL 

I think I needed the brief trip. Hug my girls. Squeeze my babies. Love on my kid. Good trip for a mother's day weekend. Happy memories instead of sitting at home, wishing I could see my kid and missing my mom. Don't get me wrong, I still miss the hell out of my mom, but it kept me from dwelling on the fact that she's not here physically anymore.  The turn-around drive is getting harder for me to do so the quick trips will be fewer if I'm driving. 

Everyone got to see that I am really handling the treatments as well as I've said, so that was reassuring to those that have been concerned. Except the hair loss. I've always had long, thick, pretty hair so this is a huge transition to it being short since Nathan cut it for me on Tues, and it being very thin from the loss. It's hair, it'll grow back.

Once I got back home Sunday evening and settled in a little, I did have Nathan go ahead and shave the rest off. It's been coming out in handfuls, so thin and finding the loose hairs all over, making me itchy... time to say good bye to it. 


Even though I have been prepared to say goodbye to my locks, it hit different. There were tears I didn't expect. I don't think it was so much that I was getting rid of my hair, but anger. Actual Anger. The feelings of why is this happening to me... what did I do to deserve this... Anger. If our punching bag was hung, I'd have had some stress relief. Instead, I ate my feelings. Potato chips. 

Finally shook out the negative self talk and the anger after a bit and went upstairs to shower and get my wigs. The daily wear one that I ordered, and one that I ordered off Amazon just as a quick, go to the grocery store or whatever kind. Much cheaper and you can tell if you really look at it, but it'll work for temporary needs. Played with them for a little bit, combing them, working to style them, etc.. Still a work in progress, but I'll get there. 

Treatment #4 on Monday.... I pray that the Lord continues to keep the side effects at bay and works to heal my body. 

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